Why I Celebrate

In the business that the Christmas season brings, I so often fall guilty at forgetting why I really celebrate Christmas. It is so easy for me to take in the baking, the gift buying, and the traditions and forget about everything else. Sometimes, I even get wrapped up in the painful memories that the season has brought since I was a little girl. All of these little excuses though, are just that…excuses to forget the reason I celebrate. As a believer in Christ, Christmas is a crucial part of what I believe. Every aspect of the Christmas story and what it means for me blows my mind; there’s no other way to describe it. Let me explain:

A virgin gave birth to the son of God. In case you didn’t know, that doesn’t just happen every day. Some probably thought she was crazy, others probably labeled her a whore; only a few knew what was really going on. She was told her son was the Messiah, but in the moment of his birth I’m sure she had no clue of his plans because he was just her baby boy who depended on her for all of his needs.

One of my favorite parts was how He came to earth. The Jews were looking for a big political figure to be their Savior. He could have come as a king with all the money and politics included, but he did not. He could have come with the power of a storm or a forest fire taking over the world, but once again he did not. He came to earth as a helpless baby who was born in a barn and placed in a feeding trough. This was birth that had been prophesized about. He was the struggling servant they had heard about and he was here to fulfill these prophesies. The timing for him was perfect. The One who the Jews had been waiting for didn’t just come for them; He came for all peoples, people of every nation and people group. He came in a way so humbling that it’s hard to fathom.

Most importantly, it’s hard to look at this birth without thinking about the cross. This is the boy, the king of the world, grew up and paid the price for me-for everyone. He willingly spread out his hand and was nailed to a cross for us. He was killed in the most gruesome way possible. He saved the world starting from that tiny feeding trough all the way to the cross.

Without this day, all of the other things I believe could never have taken place. It is on this day that the world was utterly changed. He left the throne of God to endure the pain and disgust of this awful place. He did it willingly. He did humbly. He did it perfectly.

You're Not so Little Anymore....

My love for you may be hidden in the way I give you a hard time, but secretly I think the world of you. I have never been protective over anyone like the way I am with you. I don’t ever want anything bad to happen to you. I want your dreams to come true and for you to fulfill the purpose you’ve been given. You have a huge heart and I can’t wait to see how else you’re going to use it for good in this world. I am proud of you and the person you are becoming. You’re not so little anymore and as sad as that makes me, I am so excited to see where the future takes us. I love that I can make you laugh with only one word and you can do the same for me. You try and see the good in everyone and have more passion than most people. I can’t get over how amazing you already are. Happy birthday, little one, I love you.

Thankful for the Little Things

I wrote this last year when I blogged for my school. I decided I needed a reminder of it this year too. So with a few changes here it is...

As we all know, life sometimes gets a little overwhelming. The smallest things start to really irritate us and bigger things are just pain to have to deal with. For me, it’s things like my full hamper of dirty clothes, having a lot of homework or my computer being a little slow. They may sound silly to you, but on a hard day, these are the things I get frustrated with. However, this time when I was beginning to get irritated, I realized that I to be thankful for those things. Here are some of the things that irritate me and what I have discovered about them. So, I am thankful for:

Having a hamper full of dirty clothes because I have clothes to wear. I can pick and choose what I wear every day. A day never goes by that go without clothes.

Having a lot of homework and studying to do because I get to go to school to further my dreams. I attend a university with a great nursing program that is going to train me to be an amazing nurse.

My computer being slow because I am blessed enough to have one. Not everyone can use facebook, do schoolwork, or blog whenever they want.

My old sweatshirt with a rip in it because it keeps me warm.

The parking spot the farthest away because I have two working legs and I can walk. I have a vehicle.

Not having enough time to call the people back who leave me messages because I have friends and family who love me and want to hear from me. They encourage me and stand by me.

My alarm that goes off too early for my liking because it means I am alive. I get to do life again each day.

In Need of Some Stiches

This wound is the biggest I have. It’s deeper than any abrasion I could imagine. It’s gross and I don’t want anyone else to see it. I ignored the pain and pushed through for a long time. I even tried fixing it myself with a band-aid. However, something that vast cannot be fixed with only a band-aid. That only masked the wound and in the end has made it worse. I’ve done a very good job at hiding and ignoring it. Still, that has just let it fester and become more repulsive than it was before. It’s infected. For the sake of myself, I have to let someone look at it. The dirt and bacteria need to be cleansed and it needs to be stitched up. It is going to be painful and difficult to go through. It’s going to hurt, and people are going to see how deep and awful it is, but it is the only way for it to heal.

Starting the Wild Ride

Well, in case you have missed the memo, I've been accepted to be a NURSING STUDENT!!! Ahhhh! All the stress and worrying I have had about getting into a program is finally gone. I knew I was called to be a nurse, but it's so nice to show anyone who ever doubted or questioned that this really is what I have been called to do in life. Getting to this point has not been easy in the least, and the road ahead is not going to be any easier. I know it is going to be hard and exhausting, but I am so ready for it. I am so excited (and maybe slightly terrified) about what these next few years of nursing school will bring. It's gonna be an exciting, difficult, and rewarding journey. Get ready, it's gonna be a crazy ride.

LA 243

This time a year ago I remember exactly where I was. I remember how stressful a bad living situation is. I remember having meetings with our resident director and leaving feeling so incredibly discouraged. I remember contemplating packing up my car and moving back home because of the living situation I was in. After all the anger, frustration, and talking myself into sticking it out, I was finally moved into a new apartment.

I was so nervous to bring over my first load of belongings. Nobody wants an unknown 5th person in their apartment and I didn’t know if that was going to be evident in how they were going to treat me. I wanted the transition to be as painless as possible for them and for myself. As I walked in I was given a huge welcome from all the girls and remember what a huge relief that was. I knew this was going to work. I remember unpacking and how my new roommate, Jessica gave me the “low down” of the girls and the apartment. The girls were more welcoming than I could have ever imagined. They reorganized things to give me space, they let my life blend in with theirs, and most importantly they saw me as one of them.

I seriously could not have asked for better roommates. They were exactly what I needed. They saw the good, the bad, and the ugly about me. They were there when I was excited about life, when I was sick and puking my guts out, when I needed comfort, and when I wanted to break down and cry. Together we went through some amazing times but also through some very trying times. I do not consider these lovely ladies to just be my former roommates, they are also my family and some of my best friends. I know if I ever need something or someone to talk to, that they are there. They won’t just give me a sugar coated answer; they will give me the hard truth that I need to hear. The qualities they possess are rare to find in people. They are some of the most incredible and solid people I know. So Jessica, Tiffany, Desiree, Kristi, and Bradyn too, thank you for welcoming me into your lives with open arms and for becoming some of the best friends I have. You ladies are wonderful and I’m so thankful to be a part of your lives. I love you all.

A Little Nervy...

Tomorrow is possibly the biggest interview of my life. This is the final process to see if I will be in the nursing program at CBU. It decides not only the next semester and few years of my life, but also my future. I didn’t start to get nervous about it until sometime yesterday. Then I realized what a big deal it is and how much it really will affect my life. BAM! PRESSURE. I got nervous about the silly things like what outfit I would wear and if my mouth would get too dry to talk. Then I got nervous about the real stuff too. Will the things I want them to know about come across clearly in what I say, or will they be lost in my nervousness? Will I be the kind of nursing student they are looking for?

Good thing it won't be this bad ;)