Going Home

Dear Grandma,
It’s been a year since you went home. I still have a hard time believing you are not here. Sometimes I still pick up the phone to call you and quickly remember you are not here to listen to my exciting news. I went through graduation knowing it would have made you so proud to finally see my finish. As much as it hurts for you not to be here with me, I know you are so much happier where you are.

I remember when my mom told me you were in the emergency room. My heart sank as tried to face reality. I did not go into your room for a few days. When I finally brought myself there the nurse wasn’t ever sure if you would be able to hear me or know I was there. The moment I saw you, I began sobbing because I knew you would be leaving me. My heart ached because there was nothing I could do to help you. You hung on for several days, but when you finally went home, it was kind of a relief. We knew you were no longer in pain, that you got to see grandpa again, and you were with your Father.

As I think about you, one amazing quality about you sticks out. You were incredibly selfless. You never hesitated to offer a room to someone or cook them a meal. You would go out of your way to make others happy. You never judged and saw the best in everyone. I want to be like that. I want to make you proud.

I think about you all the time. Sometimes it makes me sad, but other times I find myself laughing about all the good times we had. I miss our times together. I miss the crazy holidays. I miss your silly jokes. I miss you. Grandma, I love you so much and I cannot wait until I can see you again.