More Than Just Laughter

On Friday afternoon I found out that my grandma was in the hospital. I knew it didn’t sound good, but tried to stay positive. Nothing could have prepared me for how bad it actually was. She wasn’t breathing on her own when she was in the ambulance and was put on a ventilator as soon as she got to the hospital. She got some kind of infection that was taking over her body and immediately started shutting her kidneys down.

Saturday the infection moved up and then she got pneumonia. The doctors told us that it was very unlikely that she would recover and if she did, she would never have the same quality of life. They gave her 2-3 days but said the medications are working against us and she could go any minute.

I decided I wanted to see her Sunday afternoon. It shocked me. I had only seen people on life support on Grey’s Anatomy and ER; it was nothing like that. She seemed so helpless and frail. There was nothing I could do to help her which totally killed me.

By Monday, we wanted some real answers and advice from doctors. They got finally got things moving and decided to do an EEG (which tests brain activity), more CAT scans, and a MRI.

Tuesday we met with some doctors that told us my grandma had suffered numerous strokes. Her brain activity was very low and it was bleeding. Now they said that her chance of fighting this infection was still very slim but if she did she still might not ever wake up, she would be blind, not be able to move her hands, wouldn’t be able to speak, and wouldn’t know who we were. Their suggestion to us was to take her off life support. We gathered everyone at the hospital to say good bye and at 11p.m. they took her off. We thought she’d last around an hour but it quickly became later and later.

Wednesday was very hard. I knew what was coming and yet didn’t want to face it. It was hard to realize that she never got to see my graduation pictures (she wanted a big one), she’d never celebrate Christmas with us (something very special to her), and I would never be able to call her again. I soon found myself at the hospital for over 24 hours, I couldn’t leave. My grandmother finally passed away at 8:30 p.m. on Wednesday night. No matter how much I had tried to prepare myself, it didn’t work. It is still devastating and hurts extremely bad.